This is a great topic, and one that everyone can learn from.
First a caveat- I do hunt in an area where a lot of people know my family and that does open some doors. Not always. But I have amassed a lot of great pheasant cover over the last several years and made some good friends doing so. But here are some of my personal rules and techniques.
- I try and hide my damn license plate when I pull in. Not to be shady- I have to live in the metro of Des Moines for work, and I sense as soon as they see that county plate there is already a strike against me. I never lie about where I'm from, but always mention where I grew up and how so they know I can close gates, etc. Eventually the "where you from" question pops up and I try and start an image before it does.
- I NEVER, EVER, EEEVVVER pull a man off a tractor.
- I prefer to talk in person so I can be measured up properly, but if phone is required I never call after 8pm or during a meal hour. Like me, they don't answer unrecognized numbers anyhow.
- If not hunting that day, I always ask if they'd like a call at that time or if I can go out any time. 50/50 response interestingly.
- Always confirm boundaries and any other rules they may have.
- Dog sits in the front seat nicely and illustrates I do take things seriously.
- Try and keep a treat in my pocket for the farm dog.
-Never make a sexist assumption that the male is the owner. A couple places I hunt are owned by the wife and she makes all the calls on it.
- When I get turned down its usually because they/family hunt it. I ask how they've done and compare notes. After chatting awhile I have had people say I could hunt after the holidays or similar.
- When turned down with a softer 'no', I'll mention I may ask again in the future, and have always been invited to do so.
- I print a business card with my contact info on it, as they should know how to reach me since I can reach them. Need to add my vehicle info to it.
- About once a week I listen to the WHO Radio farm show, just to have a sense whats going on out there. I never pretend to understand agriculture but it does help to keep a conversation going with "I was reading somewhere..." I do care about whats going on out there.
- I don't offer money as 1- I can't afford to, 2- Most farmers could buy/sell me with the amounts of money it takes to farm now, and 3- I don't want to set forth an idea of pay to play and have IA turn into SD.
- I am also a beekeeper, and the following summer I drop off a jar of honey as a thank you and then ask about the following year. Its a good conversation starter and seems really appreciated, as well as makes me memorable.
These are the ones that come to the top of my head. I've gotten to where I enjoy the challenge of getting/keeping acreage to hunt nearly as much as I do the hunting itself. And the people in the country are largely great people.