Biggest Bull$#!t story you almost got away with

BleuBijou

BleuBijou

Active member
I was reading Ruttcrazed thread in the Kansas forum and it brought back a memory of a funny story! Well at least to me!!!! I was up Elk hunting and a few boys from Kansas happened by!!! They stopped and were asking general questions that most new comers to the area ask! I was a good soldier and gave them some great spots if'n they wanted to hike that far!! Then for some unknown reason I asked if they had their Yetti Habitat stamp!! With the biggest confused looks from the 4 guys and all of them looking at one another, I knew I had them!!!! So, I said no worries the gas station down the hill sells them and they are only 5 bucks a piece, but you surely do not want to be caught without one!!! Big fine!!! They all loaded up and were hell bent for that gas station when my Buddy fell over laughing, ruining the picture I had in my head of that gas station clerk telling them boys they had been had!!!!! I honestly do not know what came over me to do this and is the god's honest truth story!!!! Would like to hear some of you guy's Biggest BS stories that were ruined or that you did get away with for a short time!!! No Wife or Husband stories please!!!!:cheers:
 
good story. Reminds me of working on framing crews and sending the new guy to the crew down the street to borrow their board stretcher. You knew you had a keeper if he came back after all the hooping and hollering from the neighboring crew. Seen a couple guys come back red faced and get in their truck and leave. Seen a couple come back and want to fight. Good stuff
 
Use to tell young Privates to check the shocks on the Bradley (large armored personel carrier). They'd ask how; and I'd tell 'em to jump up and down on top of it. Absolutely hillarious sight. Of course I also had to tell 'em to get exhaust samples for the maintenance chief, or a box of grid squares for the map, batteries for the chem lights etc... . The Boom!!!! test on the gun was the best. Just imagine an 18 year old kid screaming boom into the end of a 25mm cannon in the motorpool. You know there has to be a better way to check for cracks in the receiver.

Really got fired up one time for sendinding one after a PRC-E8 (pronounced prick E 8).

Also never use the snipe hunting thing on a good 'ol boys kid if your near water. Chances are he'll come back with one and the Game warden too.


Have a Good 'Urn,
bones
 
carptom1 said:
good story. Reminds me of working on framing crews and sending the new guy to the crew down the street to borrow their board stretcher. You knew you had a keeper if he came back after all the hooping and hollering from the neighboring crew. Seen a couple guys come back red faced and get in their truck and leave. Seen a couple come back and want to fight. Good stuff
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Carptom I used that one on a newbie except it was a sod stretcher!!!! Told him it was in the truck and was green and not to come back without it!!!! 3 hours later he came back head down low and said he can't find the damn thing!!!! LOL!!!!!:cheers:
 
I liked to sent Privates to the company office for Id-10t cards. It back fired on me once when the kid, went to the Base Generals office. The general had me In class A's locked and coked, explaining Why I had sent said private to his office for IDIOT Cards. :eek:
 
i like to tell the new guys digging in the hole to be carefull with the spade. they are getting very close to the gas line. then on the next stab with the spade i make a loud hissing sound. funny as hell watching them jump out of hole.:thumbsup:
 
Once told a young airman at the morning meeting to be quite and then when he started talking again I told him to leave and not come back with out a 6 ft chunk of shoreline--well late in the day I guessed he had taken me up on it. Sure thing he shows up the next day with a long 6 ft cardboard box with sand in it--what can one do --he did what I said. I asked how his day at the beach had been and he said "sure beat being here"--boy did I feel stupid!!!!:rolleyes:
 
BleuBijou-Since you are in Colorado how do you think the drought will affect the elk hunting this year? Especially interested in the herds in the NM corner that are somewhat migratory and weather dependent? Has the state had any appreciable rain in the last few weeks?
 
In my younger days when we were out cruising for girls, if we saw some cute girls in a car we would get them to roll down their window and tell them their blinker fluid was leaking. We would offer to check it for them and hopefully get a number in exchange.
 
I was stationed on a submarine in the 80s and was the electrical lead. We were under water rationing and the washer was broken. During troubleshooting we managed to get all of the electricians clothing washed under the premise we didn't want to screw anybody if the washer broke and left somebody with soaked and soapy clothes. After a couple days of this I was pressed with an explanation and told the CO the rombo digitilizer was acting up and I'd have it done in a couple days (after the mechanics got their laundry done). That line of BS worked worked because the engineering department head kept quiet. He made me pay for that one all cruise.
 
I got to a new base and the supply officer told me he needed 6 ft of falopian tube and said not to come back until I found it. He messed with the wrong recruit. I spent 3 days hanging out. What a great excuse not to show up for work:D He wasn't supply officer for long after that:eek:
 
i once told cootie he was a great guy, tough and smarter than his dog. i guess i laid it on too thick. even coot knew jake is MUCH smarter than coot.:cheers:
 
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